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True Surrender, True Freedom

Out of my selfishness, I chased after what I thought I wanted out of life. I held on to my own pursuit of different career options and hobbies. I thought that if I just push writing down, it won’t come back and bother me again. But, that’s not how God works. I learned that God wants His children to accept His plan and will for their lives, only because He already knows.

July 22, 2019

I figured July would be a good month to talk about freedom, since, you know, the 4th (even though that day as come and gone this year). But, the way America celebrates its independence from Great Britain should be the same way, if not more, that we as children of God should celebrate our freedom from sin, death, satan, and hell. 

Greatest love was Jesus’ sacrifice. Mercy Creates

This is something that I’ve been realizing slowly over time, how much God did for us through His Son to grant us our freedom. Undeserved freedom. Freedom through grace. Unmerited freedom. Freedom through love. Not to mention that Jesus actually went through with it. He didn’t have to come, but He wanted to

It wasn’t like He thought the Father’s plan was a viable option of saving us and then chose to actually obey and bear the pain and suffering on the cross. 

No, He decided that we were worth it

It was worth it for Him to go through the agonizing pain of 39 whips, the torturous mocking, and unfair treatment to give us an opportunity to stay out of hell.

Struggling with Appearances

Celebrate freedom. Mercy Creates

Knowing this, knowing that my freedom comes solely from Christ first, I’ve realized that I’ve held on to a lot of small, minor things that don’t matter in the light of Heaven. 

Before I accepted my calling as a writer, I was bothered by the stigma that writers, and those who pursue English in college, have: that their career path is to not be taken seriously, that it’s an incredibly easy path to take, and people choose English out of laziness. The thought process behind those who study English is not the same as everyone else and lacks depth. Their career won’t take them to the “important” jobs, thus will not be contributing to society. 

I used to think that writers didn’t take life seriously, so why would I want to in that “group”?  I thought that I would be missing out from life if I became a writer, if I allowed myself to be “in that world.” All writers care about are comics and personal writing projects, right?

Boy, was I wrong. I was wrong about all of these things. 

Writers have tremendous depth, and think seriously about a vast array of topics. 

Yes, we’re different, but who isn’t

Everyone has their quirks and different interests, and yet, I somehow only had that perspective on English. That’s when I realized that it was because I didn’t want to be a writer. 

Freedom comes only through Christ. Mercy Creates

I wanted to be who I wanted to be, not who God had called me to be. 

When I realized this, I knew that my approach and mindset towards English was not so much aimed at English as it was at the talents God had given me. 

I didn’t want to own the skills He had put in me. 

I wanted to be something else. Anything else.


Out of my selfishness, I chased after what I thought I wanted out of life. I held on to my own pursuit of different career options and hobbies. 

I thought that if I just push writing down, it won’t come back and bother me again. 

But, that’s not how God works. 

I learned that God wants His children to accept His plan and will for their lives, only because He already knows

He knows the past, present, and future, and He knows how the talents and skills can be used to glorify Him. He knows that I’m the best person for this writing thing, in the way that He wants to utilize it. I’ve learned that I won’t always know what God is up to, and that is okay. I shouldn’t have to stress myself about the things that I can’t understand, simply because God’s knowledge and understanding far surpasses my own. 

This was actually pretty difficult to give up. 

I wanted to know all the things and do what I thought was best. But, I’m so grateful to have learned to give up my view of the world, my perspective, and take on God’s view and perspective. I had to come to terms that God gave me the skills and talents for a reason. And since He has the whole picture anyway, who was I to fight that? 

I fought my identity in Christ, instead of allowing freedom to take over my heart. 

The Lord has definitely humbled me and has shown me that my perspective is not always accurate. 

Surrender and accept your calling. Mercy Creates

I needed to see myself the way He sees me, and let go of all the stigma that I used to excuse my choice of running away. As soon as I allowed the Spirit to show me that I needed to let go of my desires and ideologies, the easier it was for me to accept my calling as a writer. 

True surrender brought about my true freedom. 

Just like Christ: He completely surrendered Himself to the will of the Father, and the freedom that He brought wasn’t for His sake, but for ours

“Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.” —John 15:13, NKJV


Yuliana is a blogger, proofreader, and sometimes photographer (when the occasion calls for it). She graduated with a creative writing degree in English and has a Russian minor. She strives to use her talents for God’s glory and prays that He touches others through the work of her hands. Yuliana loves meeting new people, supporting small and local businesses, and spending her time outdoors (when the Carolina heat isn’t ridiculous!). Jesus overwhelms her heart, and iced coffee runs in her veins. She currently lives Waxhaw, a city outside of the greater Charlotte area.

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The Psalms Project 2023

Thirty-three paintings that represent our messy, fluid, “abstract,” coming-and-going days … with an amazing and “piercing through the darkness” God in the midst of them.

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